Almost four years ago, I fell in love for the first time--twenty-five years too late--and began an affair. Over the years, Kevin and I have met several times a week and email several times a day. I have kept almost all of the emails that I sent to him and that he sent to me. Along the way, there has been laughter and tenderness and heat...and heartache.

This blog is the posting of our daily emails. It chronicles the lives of two people over a four year period so far, and tells the story of our burgeoning love against the backdrop of New York City.

The names and addresses have been changed to protect the innocent; the rest is 100% real.

The daily update structure helps keep the blog as authentic as possible as well as living up to its title. It also strives to provide the reader with the kind of pleasure that a soap opera offers--a daily dose of voyeuristic fun.

Please begin at the beginning, otherwise, little will make sense.

Enjoy.




Sunday, November 23, 2014

Intercourse or Rape

Sun, Jun 17, 2012 at 10:28 AM

From: Claudia Bonn@ XXXXX.XXX
To: K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX

Good morning my love:

Sorry I had to go so abruptly last night. I had to go get the kids to talk to their father. Right now, I have to take Nadi to her soccer game, backache and all, but that’s the joys of parenting. I’ll write when I get back. The bird was run over; another tear-filled morning of soothing her little heart, now buying a Guinea pig is inescapable.

I’m sure your day will involve working on your music some. So, have a great one!

I Luv u!

Moi
______________________________________________________
Sun, Jun 17, 2012 at 11:38 AM

From: Claudia Bonn@ XXXXX.XXX
To: K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX

Oh Shiny, im so freaking sad and guilty over the bird. I should’ve tried harder. I just want so much to put my head on your chest and cry me a river. Sorry about the typing, im doing it from the phone.

Xxxxxxxxxxx
______________________________________________________
Sun, Jun 17, 2012 at 11:47 AM

From: K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
To: Claudia Bonn@ XXXXX.XXX

Birds live a rough life. Their mortality rate is very high. You did all you could do. I hope somebody tries that hard to save my life. I would love to have you in my arms.

I am at work. We had a problem with the air-conditioning. It is all fixed now, but my morning is blown. That means my whole day is sideways. I hate that. I wanted to get a run in. If I don’t stay in shape, my hot fucking girlfriend may lose interest.

A guinea pig? I guess they are easy enough to take care of. They strike me as boring. It is good for kids to understand caring for things though I suppose. That usually means the mom is the care taker. Do you like animals?

I love you Roya. Have a great day.

Me
_____________________________________________________
Sun, Jun 17, 2012 at 9:57 PM

From: Claudia Bonn@ XXXXX.XXX
To: K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX

When I was at Wellesley*, I once heard a theory by a feminist somewhere that “all intercourse is rape.” I dismissed it at the time, but now I’m opening the question. I’m going to explore this.

I miss you Shiny, if I don’t write you, you won’t write me? Just to say you miss me? What have you been up to? You must’ve knocked off at least one of those songs. If I lived with you, I would be all over you all the time, like draped all over you while you did whatever… : )
______________________________________________________
Sun, Jun 17, 2012 at 10:26 PM

From: K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
To: Claudia Bonn@ XXXXX.XXX

I just finished all the songs. I don’t know if I have all the chords, but I have the basic outlines. It all came together at once. I was starting to get worried. I can at least fumble my way through.

All intercourse is rape? That is a little scary. It seems to deny biology if nothing else. What is my part in your exploration of that?

I would love to be draped in you. Now is the time I think of you most. It is quiet and I am feeling mellow.

I need to crash baby. Are you planning to stay up?

SNB in love with his HFG
______________________________________________________
Sun, Jun 17, 2012 at 10:33 PM

From: K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
To: Claudia Bonn@ XXXXX.XXX

 I have to go to sleep. Sweet Dreams.
______________________________________________________
Sun, Jun 17, 2012 at 10:39 PM

From: Claudia Bonn@ XXXXX.XXX
To: K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX

All intercourse is rape? That is a little scary. It seems to deny biology if nothing else.
Nature is in no way sensitive. Biology doesn’t have to be nice. Intercourse is an invasion. A foreign object not under one’s control is inserted into one’s body/being.
 
What is my part in your exploration of that?
The lead part, whatever you want to define it as.

I would love to be draped in you. Now is the time I think of you most. It is quiet and I am feeling mellow.
I miss you.

I need to crash baby. Are you planning to stay up?
Good-night.
 
* The name of the college has been changed to Wellesley.

 

 

 

 

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