From: K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
To Claudia Bonn@
XXXXX.XXXGood morning,
I am working early on a Saturday. It would have been nice to see a little sun. At least it won’t be noisy. I will be here most of the day. Whar are you up to?
I love that my wife indulges my hobby. What was once a business is now an expensive time consuming hobby. It is great that she comes to the shows. I wouldn’t want it any other way. However, it isn’t a date. I have work to do. If she comes with me, she needs to come early and wait around. If she comes home with me, she needs to wait while I load my equipment out. It is decidedly unglamorous, but necessary. She complains angrily for days. Instead of being able to calmly prepare and then to enjoy the afterglow, I am left dealing with her. There were nights when we finished at 10 and I was home in my pajamas at 10:30. The evening should be about the performance. Instead it ends up being about her. She will remember and share all of her inconveniences of the evening with no mention of the performance. It spoils it for both of us. Do you think it is wrong for me to want to enjoy the event instead of focusing on her?
This isn’t about sex. I could pay a hooker (except that would be gross). I could have also hooked up with any of the dozen women on AM who were looking for a quick hookup (except that would be gross). Or, I could just masturbate constantly. This is about having an intense one on one relationship with an exceptionally interesting gorgeous woman. Sex is an inevitable outcome, but not the intended result.
K.
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Sat, Jun 2, 2012 at 10:29 AM
From: K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
To Claudia Bonn@ XXXXX.XXX
The sun! I was sure today would be gloomy.
I am really looking forward to the 14th. I have been looking into things to do. The jazz clubs didn’t have much to offer on that day. A massage for two sounds interesting. There is a place that sounds really romantic. We could hang out in a private room with a hot tub after the massage. We could also take an evening cruise around Manhattan or just find a nice quiet place for dinner. I found the coolest place for dinner. It is in my neighborhood which complicates things. I can stay out as late as I need to. I can bolt from work if you can get in early. I guess we have plenty of time for planning.
XOXOXO
Me
______________________________________________________
From: Claudia Bonn@
XXXXX.XXX
To: K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
I
don’t think it’s wrong for you to want to enjoy your performance. It sounds
like your wife thinks she is doing you a favor by coming. I guess it can be classified
as passive-aggressive. I’m all too familiar with that type of attitude. All
well-meaning, but somehow it comes out wrong at the end.
I guess I wish you had trusted me enough to invite me. I most probably wouldn’t have come, because I know it would put you into a really uncomfortable situation, and I wouldn’t have wanted to see you with your wife, anyway. Even if I would’ve come, I would’ve never, either intentionally or not, done anything to harm your life. But I guess you don’t know me very well.
Anyway, have a nice day.
______________________________________________________
Sat, Jun 2, 2012 at 12:49 PM
From: K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
To Claudia Bonn@
XXXXX.XXXMy dearest Roya:
I am really sorry. Nothing would be cooler than having you come. Your presence would not be a problem at all. It never occurred to me that you would cause a problem. I would expect my wife’s presence to be awkward though.
It is nothing personal and has nothing to do with the nature of our relationship. You really have no idea how shy and insecure I am. My blushing is not an act. I don’t invite anybody. I am very uncomfortable asking for what seems like a big favor. I don’t even tell people I play. In fact, I usually say that “The Fat Man” will be at such and such a place in reference to my gigs. That is the name of my bass. The people who “know” usually find out by accident. The people in my karate school just found out this week after 15 years. Music to me is very introspective. I am NOT an entertainer. I would love to have people enjoy the music. It isn’t anything I expect people to like separately from me being in the band.
I don’t know you nearly as well now as I intend to. I hope this isn’t a problem for us. You are very special to me and I would hate to spoil anything. I wish I could give you a really big hug right now. Please don’t be mad at me. I am not very good at talking about myself. For instance, my birthday is January 8. I prefer that the day passes unrecognized.
Worried,
Me
______________________________________________________
Sat, Jun 2, 2012 at 1:59 PM
From: Claudia Bonn@ XXXXX.XXX
To: K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
Thank you for your very nice note. I was hurt. Now, I feel a little better. I would’ve never dreamt of coming as a favor. This would be one of the extremely rare nights that I could get out and stay out. I used to go see my friend Maggie’s boyfriend play the drums in a very similar situation as yours. It was a lot of fun. Maybe working at MTV, the songs you told me about seem obscure, but I know all the performers and I love Black Velvet. No matter. Thanks for the invitation, obviously I won’t come, so no worries.
R.
_____________________________________________________
Sat, Jun 2, 2012 at 2:31 PM
From: K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
To Claudia Bonn@
XXXXX.XXXPlease? There is actually no one I want there more than you. I might be wearing leather pants. Of course, it might be too hot for those.
I never meant to hurt you. It was just so confusing. I was totally focused on our date and then it all fell apart. I am sorry I didn’t handle it better. It is the only time I have ever forgotten a gig. I would have actually preferred to be with you.
The name of the band is Two Boots Blues Band. There is a website, xxx.xxxxxx.xxx
The
songs are…
Wet
Match-Etta James
Soulshine-Allman
BrothersBaby Please Don’t Lie to Me-Fabulous Tbirds
Son of a Preacher Man-Joan Osborne
Shame Shame Shame-Kenny Wayne Shepard
The Thrill is Gone –BB King
Can’t Let Go-Lucinda Williams
Black Velvet-Alana Myles
Dr. Feelgood-Aretha Franklin
I’m Going Down-Jeff Beck
OK, now you probably think I am stalking you. I hope you are enjoying this glorious day. I am still at work, but hope to leave soon.
As the song says, when things go wrong, wrong with you, it hurts me too. The whole tone of our emails has changed. That can’t be a good thing.
Still
Worried,
K.
______________________________________________________
Sat, Jun 2, 2012 at 3:15 PM
From: Claudia Bonn@
XXXXX.XXX
To: K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXXThank you. I mean it. I appreciate your trust in me. I’ll think about it. You usually dress so preppy; you in leather pants would be quite something. I bet your little ass will look great in them. You in pajamas though must be even better (sorry couldn’t resist. I love teasing you : )
I’m
very impressed by your research for the 14th. So many great choices that one
can’t easily decide. Let’s discuss them some night when you can chat.
XO
R.
_____________________________________________________
Sat, Jun 2, 2012 at 7:01 PM
From: K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
To Claudia Bonn@
XXXXX.XXXWhy would I need pajamas if we were together?
_____________________________________________________
Sat, Jun 2, 2012 at 9:30 PM
From: Claudia Bonn@
XXXXX.XXX
To: K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXXI'm at the movies watching trash. Why do I trust a 13 year old? I texted u earlier on ur cell phone. Can’t wait to get home to write you properly. I have an idea for the 14th. U around tonight? Even if not I’ll write and u can think about it. Does this mean u got my # now? I don’t mind; I trust you.
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Sat, Jun 2, 2012 at 11:41 PM
From: Claudia Bonn@
XXXXX.XXX
To: K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXXYou know what we should do? We should have dinner, then go to a nice hotel, smoke and hang out. Talk, watch a movie, take a bath, order room service and such things…This is a rarely free night for me. To have no one at home is once in ten years. I want to spend every minute of it concentrating on you, not a massage or the Manhattan skyline. Those I’ve done, you I haven’t : ) Are you shocked? : ) Seriously, just hangout. And no, you won’t need pajamas.
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Sat, Jun 2, 2012 at 11:59 PM
From: Claudia Bonn@ XXXXX.XXX
To: K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
I think your idea is perfect. I have some serious attention to pay to you. Let’s leave the world behind for an evening.
Me.
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