From: Claudia Bonn@ XXXXX.XXX
To: K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
Hi!
I
had a very nice conversation with Todd. I've known him for almost thirty years,
and I still don't really know him. He's this really repressed WASP. But I
figured after all these years, I should make an effort. So, I engaged Todd in
conversation which is really hard; his replies are very PC and come out of his
mouth very slowly. It's rare when you can get something real out of Todd, but
it's fun when you do.
Why
am I telling you this? Because I'm stoned and I'm talking to you as if I'm
talking to myself. And how would you know about hell not having an amusement
park? How literal of you : 0 Hell has an
amusement park and I've been to it. It's 94 degrees with humidity, so it feels
103. You stand for 20-40 minutes while the scorching sun burns into your skin,
dehydrated, sticky and sweaty, surrounded by very low class (God forgive me)
kind of people. Everybody fat and sweating, body odors are beginning to rise.
Three bored kids fidgeting about, kind of carrying on so that you have to engage
at least once in a while. All that for a
lame 6 minute ride. I was going to write a whole paragraph about the people,
but I decided it was mean and elitist, so I won't. It was tedious, hot and awful.
And it was all my brilliant idea! I should've listened to Sabine and gone to
the pool. One of the things I really like besides having kept the friendship
alive for the last 30 years, is that she is Greek and I'm Persian. It's so
Disney. I saw the cutest movie last night. How to Tame Your Dragon. It's really
great, an adventure story with a wonderful message.
So,
do you have some good opera people stories?
Let's
get some dessert and smear it on each other at some point? What do you think?
And my back is well. Are you going to wrestle me? : )
XO
R.
________________________________________________________
Thu, Jul 5, 2012 at 1:28 AM
From: Claudia Bonn@
XXXXX.XXX
To:
K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
You
know what we've never done? We've never danced, and don't you think that's
rather ironic? : ) we should dance. You can show me some ballroom dance moves.
I can refresh my foxtrot.
________________________________________________________
Thu, Jul 5, 2012 at 8:30 AM
From:
K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
To: Claudia Bonn@
XXXXX.XXX
Good
morning love,
How
are you today?
I
always enjoyed ballroom dancing. It has
been a long time. I wonder what I
remember. Why is that ironic? We have done some horizontal dancing.
Amusement
parks do not amuse me. I haven't been in
a long time and don't intend to. You
describe all of the annoying parts, the crowd, the lines and the really short
lame rides. The pool wouldn't have been
a lot different, except maybe a little cooler and the kids would go to bed
earlier. I would have loved to hear the
mean and elitist things. We have that in
common.
Todd
is in rough shape. Maybe you should tell
him about AM.
The
opera people weren't all that interesting.
It was a nice time though.
Somebody had rented a car so getting to Tenafly and back was easy. I did hear a new song called "America,
Fuck Yeah". Really classy.
Me
________________________________________________________
Thu, Jul 5, 2012 at 11:31 AM
From: Claudia Bonn@ XXXX.XXX
To:
K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
Good
morning, my love:
So
hung over today.
Us
not having danced, besides the horizontal kind, is ironic because your email
address says: dancing.midnight. Unless you intended it to be
"horizontal" dancing. I always found those two words next to each
other very romantic. Dancing until midnight, dancing at midnight, dancing after
midnight. It reminds me of Cinderella. Midnight is a cool time--the witching
hour.
Although
those two guys haven't had a good time together in an eternity, I, for one, am
staying as far away from that relationship as possible.
The
pool might've been a little better because only people who live in Rye can go,
plus those who apply and get approved from towns nearby like Larchmont. Still,
it probably would've been full of kid piss. The fireworks weren't that great
either. It was good to sit and watch them from the beach, but they were very
short. And then I got yelled out by a parks woman for having a glass beer
bottle on the beach, which I suppose I deserved.
I
saw the song on You Tube. It's a really dumb satire. Do you mean the song is
tasteless, or hearing it on 4th of July specifically?
I
always thought our national anthem should've been America the Beautiful, not a
war song. America the Beautiful is so cool, and it was written by a female
teacher, which makes it even cooler. And to scandalize you further, I think we
should've made our unofficial motto--E pluribus unum--out of many one, our
official motto, and put it on our money as opposed to In God we trust. Nothing
against God, I was praying my little
heart out the other day in church, and will probably pay another visit soon to
thank Him for being so merciful.
So,
what are we doing tomorrow, mon amour? Are we meeting at 12 or later? I'm so
happy to see you!
XOXOXO
R.
_________________________________________________________
Thu, Jul 5, 2012 at 11:53 AM
From:
K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
To: Claudia Bonn@
XXXXX.XXX
I
choose that name because I do think it is romantic. I was not referring specifically to the
horizontal kind, but that is obviously acceptable. That is ironic.
The
song is tasteless on any day of the year.
I think that was the writer’s intention.
It was relatively funny on the fourth.
Not
a war song for the national anthem? Good
luck with that. We are a warrior
nation. It could be worse, it could be
Battle Hymn of the Republic. In God we
trust was not the official motto until the last 10 years. It was only formalized in the 50's as a
response to communism. It had been
around before then, but was not common.
I
can meet anytime. When can you make it
in? I think we will be at the Waldorf
again. I am checking on early check
in. We probably need to check in at 2 or
so. What do you think?
_______________________________________________________
Thu, Jul 5, 2012 at 12:42 PM
From:
K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
To: Claudia Bonn@
XXXXX.XXX
None
of the hotels can promise early check in.
We won't know until the last minute if we can get in early. I guess as long as we can get in at 3 we
should be ok. We would have two hours or
so. That would allow us to take a cab to
the Met and get you to 72nd street for your massage at 7. What do you think?
SNB
________________________________________________________
Thu, Jul 5, 2012 at 1:17 PM
From: Claudia Bonn@ XXXX.XXX
To:
K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
In
that case, and since they don't seem to offer day rates, I think we should go
to the Met after lunch, then go to the hotel. As I mentioned, my husband has a
10:30 in the city. If I take the bus to meet a friend at 12 or 12:30, it means
I'll get to leave before he gets back. If I come in later, he'd be home and
would want to give me a ride.
If
we can check in at 3, then we'll have a good chunk of time before massage at 7,
like 3+ hours, which will allow the j to wear off somewhat too, because I'm not
as comfortable with it in public as you are.
You
don't sound to enthused though. My husband may start a new job soon, so if you
want to get together another time, it's fine.
XO
R.
________________________________________________________
Thu, Jul 5, 2012 at 2:06 PM
From:
K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
To: Claudia Bonn@
XXXXX.XXX
Logistics
are just not the most glamorous part of this.
We need to take our opportunities when we can. When we get a routine down it will all be
much easier. I made a 12:30 reservation
at Caffe Grazie...
26
E 84th St
(between
5th Ave & 85th St Transverse)
New
York, NY 10028
Neighborhood:
Upper East Side
(212)
717-4407
______________________________________________________
Thu, Jul 5, 2012 at 4:14 PM
From: Claudia Bonn@ XXXX.XXX
To:
K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
Hello
Shiny:
I'm
sorry I've been all over the place lately. Whenever it's full moon, I go a
little nuts because my periods are completely synchronized with the full moon.
In May, when we had an unusually big moon, I had two periods! It was very
annoying. So, anyway, it was full moon on July 3, so I'm just hoping my period
will hold off for one more day.
I
suggested the Met, because they actually have stuff I'd like to see, and the
roof garden would be great, and of course it makes sense to have lunch around
there, but once I really thought about it, it occurred to me that it's engaging
in really stupid high risk behavior. I used to live on 84th between Park and
Madison, 90% of school parents live in that exact area, and now with the kids at
camp, all the mothers who don't work are roaming, lunching and shopping, even
one of my closest friends is back from London who lives on 86th between Lex
and Park. It's like us deciding to hang out on 72nd and Amsterdam.
I
just don't want to ruin what we have by being stupid. But why can't I tell you
this BEFORE you research restaurants? Because I'm a moron, and I'm sorry. So, if you really want
to go to the Met, let's eat there. They have this cute cafe. If, not, let's go
downtown, Gaslight neighborhood, Flat Iron somewhere like that. Rubin would be
fine too. I can meet you at 12:30
I'm
sorry for driving you crazy. I love you.
Very
annoying HFG
_____________________________________________________
Thu, Jul 5, 2012 at 5:01 PM
From:
K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
To: Claudia Bonn@
XXXXX.XXX Let's meet at the Rubin. No point in tempting fate. I will find a restaurant near there. I was not all that attached to the place I picked.
Should
we wait for tomorrow before committing to the hotel? Seems like we should make sure the guest of
honor is up to the occasion.
_____________________________________________________
Thu, Jul 5, 2012 at 5:32 PM
From: Claudia Bonn@ XXXX.XXX
To:
K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
That's
up to you. Even if my period starts, it begins really slowly as spotting for
the first few days. Also, sometime ago when I was buying feminine products at
the drug store, I saw the coolest product. It's a tampon which functions like a
diaphragm, covers the cervix, but instead of being make of bulky latex, it's sheer plastic like Saran
wrap, so that people can have sex while the woman has her period. I've tried it
and it works. It's 100% as if I didn't have my period. That inventor should get
a medal! If you're interested, check it out online.
Having
said that, I'm really liberal with stuff like that, but not everyone is. I can
pick some up from the drug store, and I'm game if you are, but if you're
squeamish...
_______________________________________________________
Thursday, July 5, 2012 6:14 PM
From: Claudia Bonn@ XXXX.XXX
To:
K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
They're
called menstrual cups. Hopefully we won't need it, but I'll get some. They've
been around forever, but I only learned about them about a year ago. How weird.
Anyway, it's up to you, my love. I hope you're having fun at karate.
XOXO
Me
_______________________________________________________
Thu, Jul 5, 2012 at 7:34 PM
From:
K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
To: Claudia Bonn@
XXXXX.XXX
You
are so romantic. I hope the brand name
is a little less descriptive. I trust
your decision. I am not yet familiar
enough to know. They are all so
different. You are very modest about
your body. If you are ok, I am ok.
No
karate tonight. Holiday week. No class until Saturday. I have to work in the am on Saturday. Not for long, but early. Ouch.
I
am kind of encumbered tonight. I will
write if I can.
Love
you,
Me
______________________________________________________
Thursday, July 5, 2012 7:44 PM
From: Claudia Bonn@ XXXX.XXX
To:
K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
I'm
sorry, I'm a little dense. Are you being facetious about me being romantic? In
my own defense, would you rather I had said nothing? Maybe I shouldn't have
said anything, I don't know. I didn't intent for you to become an expert on
menstruation. Is that again a note of irony about me being very modest about my
body? I've never thought that I'm modest. Is this when you try to be funny and
it comes out mean?
What
are you encumbered with? Write when you can.
R.
_____________________________________________________
Jul 5, 2012 at 9:32 PM
From:
K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
To: Claudia Bonn@
XXXXX.XXX
Menstrual
cup is not romantic. No it's not. I am
pretty expert already. I was not being
ironic about your modesty. You seem a
little uncomfortable with your body. I
am sorry if I am wrong. I didn't mean
anything other than you seem shy in that one small way.
My
wife is sticking close. Not sure what is
up.
Let's
talk in the morning. See you soon.
SNB
_____________________________________________________
Thursday, July 5, 2012 9:52 PM
From: Claudia Bonn@ XXXX.XXX
To:
K<dancing.midnight@XXXXX.XXX
No,
not romantic at all. I guess I needed to make sure you understand I won't bleed
on you, in case you found it gross and were just being polite. It would've been
nice, dear David, if I were made of stone, but alas I'm made of flesh and
blood. I didn't know how you feel, so in case, I didn't want you to be
surprised. In fantasies, people don't have periods.
In
one breath you tell me I'm being unromantic because I'm talking about
menstruation, and in another that I AM uncomfortable with my body? How does
that make any sense?
Am
I uncomfortable with my body for real? I'm uncomfortable with imperfection in general,
including in my body. I know it's stupid. But there are also parts I like fine,
so I guess I'm ambivalent about it.
I
just don't know what's going on with us? Why are we fighting like this?
I
love you.
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